Free Posts

For Parents Seeking Financial Compensation

Kat Mulaney will help you sue your child!

Jul 3 •

A Toast to Jeff Bezos

Here's to everyone's favorite lizard-man!

Jul 1 •

Largemouth Bass Are Destroying America

An op-ed by a bird named Stephen Miller

Jun 30 •

It's Me, a Microplastic in Your Brain

Please just ignore us while we seize control.

Jun 27 •

The Beginner's Guide to the Bible

A primer for those who are still trying to figure out Leviticus

Jun 26 •

Seeking Mild to Moderate Car Guy

Now hiring for someone to expand my friend group.

Jun 24 •

Tessia Sue Phillips

To Preserve Peace, We Must Blow Up the Earth

It’s simply the only option.

Jun 23 •

Am I The Asshole: Toddler Edition

(Posted from Mommy's phone while she's in the bathroom crying)

Jun 17 •

BREAKING: Something Worse Is Happening Tomorrow

It will make today's horrors look quaint in comparison.

Jun 16 •

The Head of Disorganized Crime Has Been Arrested

Don Vitor's highly ineffective syndicate will no longer plague our fair city.

Jun 12 •

Clube de Leitura

Photos: Los Angeles Migrant INVASION

A once great American City has been occupied.

Jun 10 •

Welcome Aboard, Please Make Yourself Uncomfortable

Our airline is now worse than ever before!

Jun 9 •

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