Archive - Chortle

Hyundai Safety Warning for Anyone Over 40

Shiny dashboard reveals terrible truth about your neck.

15 hrs ago •

Danielle Koenig

October 2025

Happy Halloween from Santa Claus

Ugh, work starts tomorrow.

Oct 31 •

Warning Labels From the 'Final Destination' Universe

Death is inescapable, but class-action lawsuits aren't.

Oct 30 •

and

You Just Got Punk'd, Western Civilization!

It's been your boy Ashton Kutcher the whole time...

Oct 29 •

15 Things I Would Never Say

A handy list in case of robot doppleganger invasion.

Oct 28 •

Eric Filipkowski

Welcome to HBO-Paramount-Disney-Plus-eBay-on-Prime®️

Let's get streaming!

Oct 27 •

Even More Obvious Metaphors for the Destruction of America

White House down. What's next?

Oct 24 •

Honest Zillow Listings

This former rental has barely been cared for!

Oct 23 •

13 Lost Horror Movie Taglines

Scary slogans that never made it to theaters.

Oct 22 •

Minutes from the Committee of Random National Holidays

Please open on National Read Your Email Day.

Oct 21 •

College President: We Need More Guest Speakers We Don’t Need

Now is the time to indulge and pander.

Oct 20 •

'Life of a Showgirl' Versions Taylor Swift Hasn’t Released Yet

A preview of what's coming after her second-week sales drop.

Oct 17 •

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