Hey Stock Market, Where's Our Thank You?

By Vice President JD Vance

Mar 12, 2025

America, I find myself compelled to address a disturbing pattern of disrespect toward the Trump administration. Last month, I had the displeasure of meeting with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy, a guy who hasn’t even said thanks for the billions of American tax dollars we’ve contributed to his struggling war effort.1 Now, I'm witnessing the same ungrateful behavior from the U.S. stock market.

Let me be perfectly clear: the Dow Jones Industrial Average has not once—not once—formally thanked President Donald J. Trump for his visionary economic leadership. Frankly, I’m upset. More people are paying attention to the stock market right now than ever before! You’re welcome!

We’ve implemented tariffs that a lesser market couldn't handle, and injected the kind of unpredictability that separates the strong indices from the weak. But the president hasn’t received so much as a fruit basket from any financial institution. Where’s the love, people?

President Trump and I have been more than patient. We've given the market multiple opportunities to express its thanks. Yet instead it continues to drop, day-after-day, without even tipping its cap toward the fact that Donald Trump is president, which means you have to say thank you to him for some reason.

I've reviewed the transcripts of every CNBC broadcast from the past month, and not once did stock traders rise in unison and sing a glorious ode to Donald Trump’s unmatched wisdom. Instead, the market tumbled by 14%. That kind of ingratitude would get you uninvited from the church potluck where I come from (Yale Law School).

I ask you, New York Stock Exchange: Do you think it's appropriate to air your grievances like this—through a massive plunge—rather than in private meetings? It feels to me like you’re manipulating the American people into thinking we’re complete morons.

If the market doesn't show proper appreciation soon, we might have to reconsider our generosity. Perhaps the market would prefer if we stopped our haphazard tariff games? Maybe it would like fewer trade wars? Just know that this administration doesn't respond well to ungrateful entities. Ask Ukraine, or anyone who worked in the first Trump administration.

Here's a final thought for the stock market to consider: DOGE is keeping a spreadsheet of who's thanked us and who hasn't. Gavin Newsom? Thanked us. Ebola? Hasn’t thanked us. Let’s just say you better get a Hallmark card in the mail before all the non-thankers get shipped to Guantanamo, understand me?

So I'll ask one last time: Stock Market, are you grateful for what we've done to you?