An exclusive interview with a 200-Year Old Condom
The viral prophylactic shares centuries of wisdom
An almost 200-year-old condom - in "mint condition" - has just gone on display at an exhibition at the Rijksmuseum in Amsterdam. It is thought to be made of a sheep's appendix and features an explicit print representing a nun and three clergymen. - BBC
AMSTERDAM, NETHERLANDS — Earlier this month, a sheep's intestine turned prophylactic turned museum artifact became an unlikely internet sensation. The nearly 200-year-old condom went viral after photos of its explicit engravings—featuring a nun and three clergymen in a compromising position—spread across social media.
From the inside of a sheep to the outside a phallus, this piece of penile protection has seen a lot over nearly two centuries of human history. It's traveled across continents and generations, witnessing the fall of empires, two world wars, the sexual revolution, and the birth of the internet. Now, it finds itself under museum spotlights, fielding interview requests, and managing its newfound social media presence.
I caught up with the condom as it vaped outside the employee entrance of the museum and fielded calls from its newly hired publicist.
Walk me through how you went from luxury brothel accessory to museum centerpiece. You must have seen a lot.
CONDOM: [Settles back, exhaling] You got that right. I’ve serviced kings and paupers, my man. I started out in this high-end Parisian “establishment” way back when, but that kind of work only lasts so long. For some reason, most people want “unsoiled” condoms. Lucky for me, there are also a lot of perverts out there, though. I bounced around private collections for a few decades—met Oscar Wilde, ran with Al Capone’s gang for a bit, partied with Mick Jagger and Andy Warhol in the sixties. Then the auction circuit, until I ended up here.
The museum curator described you as being in “mint condition.” What's your secret?
CONDOM: To be honest, I was in mint condition back when I was part of a sheep's digestive system in 1829. Everything since then has been one long, crazy postscript.
Let's talk about those explicit engravings. Is there a story behind them?
CONDOM: [Grimaces] You can’t be around as long as I have without getting at least one tattoo you regret. All I can say is the 80’s were rough. The 1880’s. I was traveling through what we called the Orient at the time, ended up completely wasted on local moonshine. Walked into this tattoo parlor wanting the Japanese character for “hang loose”—very zen, you know? But I was so drunk I could barely stand. Next thing I know, I wake up with this entire tableau of religious figures getting raunchy. The artist thought it was hilarious.
How do you view modern sexual health compared to your era?
CONDOM: The technology is incredible—latex, polyurethane, ribbed, flavored, glow-in-the-dark. Though I have to say, we had more character back then. Today's condoms are efficient, but where's the personality?
Any advice for young people navigating relationships and sexual health today?
CONDOM: Same advice I would have given 200 years ago: be safe, have fun, and don't be afraid to make a statement while you're at it.
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Is this the condom in Kenickie's back pocket that he got in the 7th grade?
So, so funny!😂 You are one of a kind!! Loved the way you handled this!!