3QQ interview: Josh Gondelman on Attitude
The standup comic and NPR regular talks life and death.
Welcome to Three Quora Questions, our series of interviews in which a guest expert joins me to field strange and interesting questions posed on Quora.com (the internet’s oddest knowledge repository).
Today I’m joined by comedian , creator of the delightful newsletter Josh is reputed to be the nicest guy in comedy, and he agreed to do this interview very quickly so I can’t personally dispute those rumors. If you read this and for some reason feel like you’ve heard Josh make jokes about inflation, it’s probably because he’s a frequent guest on NPR’s Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!1
Nice guys purportedly finish last, but Josh seems to be doing just fine for himself. So I decided to ask him three *pressing* questions about attitude. As usual, these questions were posed by real folks on Quora.
Is attitude everything?
JOSH: Attitude is not everything. That's why there are all the other words like "ability" and "capacity" and "spite" and "burritos" and "physics." But a good attitude can get you pretty far.
Although I will say, I have a lot of respect for a good bad attitude, too. It's always dazzling to me when I encounter someone who takes no shit. I'm always like... not even a little shit? How do you even ride public transportation? I have to respect anyone with a level of self-worth that is ultimately limiting.
I made a promise to change my attitude to a positive one, but I always go negative all the time for no reason. What is the best way to change my attitude?
JOSH: Okay, so here's the thing: There are so many reasons to go negative. There's so much pain and malice and greed in the world, plus sometimes you get a pre-made sandwich at the airport, and it's got a medically inedible slice of tomato on it. It makes a ton of sense to see the grimmer side of things, especially if you have a history of negativity. It's usually obvious and often necessary to do.
Choosing to view the world optimistically isn't like snuggling into a sleeping bag made of good vibes, where you zip yourself in and that's it. It's more like getting dressed. You've got to do it every day, bit by bit, according to the circumstances you're facing at the time. When you feel yourself being negative, which, again, is normal, take a moment and ask yourself: "What if this goes as well as it can?" or "How can I make this foul situation better for the people involved?" or "What are some resources I can lean on for support?" or "Can I leave early and go somewhere more fun?"
I wrote about this a bunch in my book (PLUG), but people who look at the world and think everything is good aren't optimists. They're dumbasses. People who see the world as it is and still approach it with hope and effort — those are the real optimists. And you can choose to be one in any given moment, even if you sometimes have trouble putting on a happy face.
What is your attitude towards death?
JOSH: Doesn't seem like it's for me, although I may change my mind at some point.
More Josh Gondelman
Check out Josh’s book Nice Try: Stories of Best Intentions and Mixed Results and his standup special People Pleaser.
And don’t forget to subscribe to his weekly newsletter, That’s Marvelous!
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