The World Baseball Classic Explained (by a Nihilist)
The teams, the stakes, and the abyss.
The World Baseball Classic begins today with a highly anticipated matchup between the baseball hotbeds of Australia and Chinese Taipei. Obviously, even fans who don’t closely follow the sport will be excited to see household names like Chen Zhong-Ao Zhuang and Todd Van Steensel in action this March.
But surprisingly, many casual observers remain unaware that the baseball world is gathering this spring for the sixth triennial WBC. One might assume this is because the World Baseball Classic doesn’t matter relative to other baseball tournaments, such as the World Series and the Olympics. But it’s actually because nothing matters.
Here’s the breakdown.
What is the World Baseball Classic?
An international baseball tournament held roughly every three years, in which one national team is crowned the champion. This exemplifies Schopenhauer’s idea that the will to live is a blind, insatiable force that drives man toward ends that cannot ultimately satisfy us.
Which countries are participating?
Twenty nations, including the United States, Japan, Dominican Republic, Cuba, Venezuela, Mexico, Puerto Rico, and Italy. Rosters are built on nationality and heritage. Each player is just the latest iteration of an unbroken chain of suffering extending back to the first humans who looked at the sky and wondered why.
Which team is the favorite?
Japan is the defending champion. Their roster is deep, their fundamentals are exceptional, and they have already proven their ability to impose greatness upon a universe that is indifferent to human achievement. Their infield defense is also exceptional.
What about the United States?
Team USA fields elite talent and has won the tournament once, in 2017. They are a legitimate contender. God is dead, Nietzsche wrote, and we have killed him—meaning that modern humanity, having dismantled the frameworks that once gave existence structure and purpose, must now create its own values or perish in the void. Team USA’s bullpen will be a key factor here.
Should I watch?
Yes. The games are excellent and the emotion is genuine. You will see grown men weep openly on a baseball field in March, which is one of the few remaining contexts in which this is socially permitted. Such moments of pure feeling are the closest humans come to briefly escaping the tyranny of the will.
When does it start?
10 PM Eastern. Play ball!
MORE FROM CHORTLE
MLB Spring Training, By The Numbers
After months of box score deprivation, baseball fans can finally breathe easy again. Spring training is here and our favorite sport resumes its familiar rhythms and routines: the crack of the bat, the roar of the crowd, the Dippin’ of the Dots.
Forgotten Baseball Nicknames, Explained
Baseball has spawned some great nicknames over the decades: The Sultan of Swat. The Splendid Splinter. Joltin' Joe. All legendary. But few people realize that many of MLB’s most obscure mediocrities had nicknames just as colorful as those.
“ends that cannot ultimately satisfy us . . . . unbroken chain of suffering . . . . indifferent to human achievement . . . . briefly escaping the tyranny of the will” — you cribbed this from the White Sox media guide, right?