FBI Most Wanted: Trump Edition

America's Top Ten Threats to Authoritarianism

Since 1950, the FBI’s Most Wanted Fugitives program has served as the nation’s premier public safety initiative, successfully apprehending over 90% of its targets through the cooperation of vigilant citizens. Now, under the strategic direction of new FBI Director Kash Patel, the Bureau is more committed than ever to identifying and neutralizing the most pressing threats to America.

If you have any information concerning the following persons, please contact your local FBI office, the nearest American Embassy or Consulate, or text Pete Hegseth at his publicly available phone number.

10. Judge Elaine Haskins

Federal judge who flagrantly undermined border security by ruling it unconstitutional to tattoo “America's Bitch” on the buttocks of deported migrants.

9. Rami Khaled

Treasurer of the Muslim Student Union at Stanford University, who once said on a podcast that he doesn’t like the national anthem.

8. Elliot Branson

Associate at high-profile law firm Paul Weiss, who, during a recent Rose Garden ceremony, displayed treasonous disrespect by refusing to accept an atomic wedgie from the President.

7. Dr. Vivek Raghavan

Medical researcher who invented a life-saving technique that eliminates brainworms, threatening the neurological ecosystem that has sustained numerous political careers.

6. Phil Keoghan

Executive producer and host of The Amazing Race, who defeated Donald Trump for Emmy Awards in 2004 and 2005.